So yeah, I missed enough days that it's really just time for a new numbering scheme. As for the past weekend, I've been feeling fine (at least not dysthymic) since Friday. I had a lot of trouble focusing on my proposal but I did get that done (knuckling down at the few days/hours) and with a lot more words than everyone else apparently. Finally got around to grading exams Tuesday night (really Wednesday morning) after coming home from a movie night. Was able to get through them relatively quickly, finished up around 4 in the morning. Went to bed, but took at least 30 minutes to go to sleep. Listened to the birds and recorded one for inspiration.
I felt great today (especially the first half of the day), even with like less than 4 hours of sleep. Absolutely beautiful outside, my work is done so I get to take the next few days off and man did that make me feel good (maybe?). Did two trips through the Arboretum, looked at birds over the marsh on a boardwalk I hadn't done before. Saw a big tree with beaver marks.
Had a grad student committee meeting, didn't get much out of it but whatever. Talked with colleagues. Sat around listening to tiny desk concerts while I waited to go to institute. Went to institute. Lots of people showed up because it was pizza day. Hung out a bit after institute. Went back to my office because I left all my stuff there and to wait to go Aurora hunting. Went home, sky was cloudyish and according to predictions, it wasn't going to reach here anyway. Maybe tomorrow. Got home around 11. Lay around for a bit. Came downstairs to write this.
What's the point of all of this? Well, I am once again unsure if I'm feeling good because this is normal or because of (potential?) hypomania. I was obviously higher energy than normal and I skipped a lecture to ride my bike on pure impulse. It's 1 am and I'm just starting to get tired (minus like a 10 minute nap in the mid afternoon after the bike ride). But while grading I was mostly just focused, not agitated (though there was some pacing) and irritated. I've had lots of creative thoughts (writing Fishing for Birds and getting a hook I almost like) but haven't actually worked on scoring Counting Sheeple like I planned to. And like, there's plenty of contextual reasons to be happy. No more grading. Don't need to think about my proposal for a couple days. Beautiful weather. Pizza. I didn't feel extra talkative today, but maybe I was (but also I'm just a talkative person...). So yeah, I guess I'll maybe figure this out one day. Manic or just a weird unipolar depressive? Who knows. I need to call the psychiatrist tomorrow and set something up. And do some other admin stuff. Like grocery shopping.
Oh and I'm sunburned now.
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